✨ I started a 'Women's Circle' - February 2024 ✨

I hosted a women’s circle on the weekend. It wasn’t my first, but it was my first in a long time. I went to a psychic when I was 19 years old. Not my first psychic. I had got ‘into’ them by 15 years old thanks in part to my early questioning and curiosity around all things spiritual/psychic/astrological and in part, due to my godmother always talking to me about her going to see psychics every 18 months or so.  I had just lost my maternal grandmother (and as they can be sometimes, our relationship was complicated, as was her relationship with my mother). The psychic’s name was Elizabeth and immediately her reading was on point. She told me my grandmother was still in a ‘healing hospital’ which was where souls went to rest and recover from their life here on earth, particularly those souls who perhaps hadn’t ‘gone to plan’. She told me later in the reading that my guides have come through and told her I am a ‘healer’. ‘A what?’, I asked. A healer she repeated. I had no idea what that meant and she said why don’t I come along to a weekly class she was starting. What sort of class? A psychic class of sorts as it turned out.

I turned up at her house the following week having no idea what to expect or even whether what I was doing was legal (weren’t witches burned for this sort of shit?). My mum in the early days also warned me against it being a cult of some sort. Classic mum. We all gathered in her kitchen while Elizabeth finished her smoke and we were all gestured to move to her lounge room. I would spend the best part of the next fourteen years on that couch, once a week, learning how to ‘be psychic’ but oh so much more. The format would always be – smoke in the kitchen, move to the lounge room and wait for Elizabeth to connect with spirit and they would tell her what we would talk about. We had a direct channel to spirit and asked hundreds of questions and received unlimited wisdom. My favourite parts were what followed our lengthy discussions - the group meditation. I can’t remember whether I had meditated before this or even knew what it was. Elizabeth led the group through the meditation and was often guided by spirit to a certain place or planet or time. I didn’t know what I was feeling but I definitely felt something happening during the meditation. About 12 weeks in, I actually saw something in my meditation too. And then, I was hooked. It was as good as any drug I had already tried at that point. For the next fourteen years, I learnt, I experienced and I lived for this circle. I had a few months off here and there went I went overseas, or a had a baby but continued into my thirties before reaching a point where I knew, my time with Elizbeth had run its course. I still saw her regularly and loved her like a second mother.

Fast forward the rest of my thirties, and some of my forties (and four babies in total) later, to September last year. I’ve just been diagnosed with ADHD at the ripe old age of 43, I’m burnout (I finally have language for what has been a regular occurrence in my life up until this point) and I don’t really know who I am (again) with this diagnosis and recent ‘life’ events. My business partner kindly offered me her house for the weekend while they were away, to rest and relax. I spent the entire weekend trying to get as still as possible, with limited stimulation so I could find that part of me. The spiritual part of me that while never completely going, had over the last decade and a bit, dissolved into the background. The part of me that lived and breathed ‘class’ religiously, had been slowly suffocated with the demands of four children, my own ‘adulting’ and responsibilities. It was during that weekend where I immersed myself in as much spiritual shit I could find, and that made me realise, just how much I missed it.

Over the next few months, I increased many elements of my practice. I even got up at 4am for six weeks to fit in meditation, journalling, tapping and breathwork. For me, 4am wasn’t sustainable so I have moved it to 5am and still try and get as much in as possible (and now I have some space in my day to do more if I want). Somewhere in the increasing of my practice, my intuition became noticeable again for the first time in a long time. My knowing had returned. During one meditation in December, I felt spirit imply – it’s time. It’s time for me to do the thing that I loved so much, for me and for others to experience my version of it.

So last Saturday, I took a deep breath and welcomed five people to the circle. And I nailed it. And I loved it. And I know everyone there felt something. And I’ve already booked the next one on the Full Moon in March. And I know it’s the beginning of something magical.

✨ 888 words - just saying ✨